Sex

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DREA’S RUNDOWN | HUMP DAY DELIGHT: WHEN FRISKY BUSINESS GOES WRONG…..

Posted by Drea's Rundown on June 20, 2012
Posted in: SEX. Tagged: , , , . 7 comments

     So you’re ready to spice it up huh? You’ve spent hours perusing isles of your local sex toy shops,  reading books with titles like “How To Make Love Like a Porn Star, or  ”Become A Vixen”, all leading up to you busting it like an “Uzi” for your boo thang. You’ve  sufficiently got yourself pumped up, with  Rihanna’s Cake  single on repeat,  deeming it the official soundtrack for the kink fest about to take place….You’re gonna make him your bitch, right??  Oh yeah, Oh yeah! (pelvic thrust in the air)  He wants that old thing back….and you’re  Tony Danza, prepared to show him just Who’s Boss right? You have every intention of showing him that the old girl’s still got it, and in some instances show him what he’d be missing if he doesn’t get his act together! 

After hours of secretive Googling you have a list of things to add to the “spank bank”……But here in lies the problem. You’ve read these sex-pert articles (with plenty of pictures) and are so excited you forget to stay in your lane, and are totally delusional  about the realm of your…ahem.. “capabilities” shall we say?

Here is a list of things you should think twice about before trying…

Candle Waxing- Nothing sexier than pouring BOILING HOT WAX on an area of your man that isn’t used to feeling anything hotter than a sweater right?  WRONG. In a worse-case scenario you start pouring hot liquids with your must seductive come hither look, and he screams like a bee-yatch and you are either completely full of laughter and questioning his sexuality, or you are completely and utterly turned all the way off.  I would strongly suggest you research this method of sex play extensively,  or  evaluate his level of pain tolerance before giving your partner’s ego and body third degree burns. Yea,… just  a few extra precautions in case….

Kama Sutra Positions- The “Rising Cow Moon” looks interesting doesn’t it?  The article or book you read probably explained what a mind blowing orgasm you both will have if you try it. What it forgot to explain to you is that you are not an effin’ gymnast, nor have you ever been. These Yogaesque/ complex looking sexual positions require FLEXIBILITY, which I’m sure just escaped you while delusions of grandeur were running rampant in your mind. Now if you feel like pulling a muscle, taking a trip to the ER, and going through the embarrassment of explaining how you got injured to the doctor by all means go ahead. Otherwise I suggest you enroll in a local yoga class or incorporate stretching into your daily routine before you try to prove that you are a human pretzel.

Human Dessert- Ohhh  sounds yummy, right?  You’re going to turn your vag into a personal ice cream sundae for your man., huh? Awesome idea…oh wait it’s not. That is a certified one-way ticket to Yeastville. According to womenshealth.gov ‘consuming extreme amounts of sugary  foods’  is main cause of a yeast infection. So if your vagina just so happens to eat two scoops of ice cream coated in chocolate and whip cream there’s a good chance you are going to catch that “ill na-na”. Here’s a word of advice, move the dessert up top where everything is external and can be cleaned without leaving any residue.

You Wanna Feel My Squeeze Box?-  So you are throughly impressed with yourself, and all the Kegel exercises you’ve been practicing.  I mean, you damn near have your own personal suction cup down there as far as you’re concerned. Hell you could crush a can down there… woah… let’s not go too far, but you get the picture. So he’s inside you now, you guys are one, and then you get it in your mind to serve him with the Pièce de résistance…. Your ego is yelling, FINISH HIM! (inserts Mortal Kombat voice) Woah there tigress….may wanna loosen up on the death grip.  Even though you garner several kudos from your partner, you’ve managed to squeeze the condom clear off…, and unfortunately now it along with its contents are securely tucked away inside your buried treasure trove…. Post- coital is going to be pretty AWKWARD after lover boy fishes the empty condom from your squeeze box….Plan B?

Personal Stripper- Pole dancing amongst NON-exotic dancers is getting pretty popular these days but don’t let societal trends get you gassed up just to make a fool of yourself.  Youtube search “strippers falling off the pole” and then immediately go and enroll in a pole dancing class before you embarrass yourself and end up in a neck brace and a cast that no amount of sexy lingerie can cover up!

Notice a theme here? You are not a porn star, contortionists, or doctor. Master the bedroom skills you already have and add in the bells and whistles slowly but surely. Think about the consequences of your new “tips and techniques” and then tweak them to fit your lifestyle you sexy little siren you!

DREA’S RUNDOWN | HUMP DAY DELIGHT: TRY AND REPEAT POSITION OF THE WEEK

Posted by Drea's Rundown on May 16, 2012
Posted in: SEX, Uncategorized. Tagged: , , , . Leave a Comment

TRY AND REPEAT

  “PENIS TICKLERS”

     Gals this little doohickey is best when you’re already in the reverse cow girl position facing his feet. Lisa Sussman, author of book “350 Best Sex Tips Ever”, advises ladies to, “consider this little trick just as he’s about to have his orgasm, grasp his toes and pull gently.”  With tons of sensitive nerve endings in the foot and toe area, this erogenous hot zone is sure to intensify and stoke any bedroom flame.  Next time you and the significant other go at it for a romp in the sheets, be sure to move your hips to a synchronized rhythm, squeeze your “love box”, then gently tug on his toes for an intensified O…………..Yowwwza🔥🔥    #TryAndRepeat2X

Work Cited: Sussman, Lisa. 350 Best Sex Tips Ever. Carlton Publishing Group, 2003.

Hump Day Delight: 5 Tips To Keep It Banging In The Bedroom

Posted by Drea's Rundown on April 18, 2012
Posted in: Uncategorized. Tagged: , , . 1 comment

THINK SPICY. Here’s a question. What are you thinking about leading up to your sexy session? Work? Bills? Your favorite show?The kids? Drama that’s happening with your friends? STOP IT. You shouldn’t be thinking of anything but how much you care for your significant other  and most importantly, how you are about to give it to em like BOOM POW. Real rude boy and rude girl like. Focus and confidence are key. Remember if you aren’t confident of your sexual talents then there is no way you’ll be able to convince your partner. ALSO, be of the mind-set that it is far more pleasurable to GIVE than RECEIVE. Besides, no stingy lovers were ever remembered in the pages of history books OR the memory banks of former lovers minds for that matter. One of the highest forms of flattery and BIGGEST turn ons in the bedroom is hearing your lover chant your name over and over like their own personal mantra urging you to take them to new heights, giving you the coveted title of “Bedroom Champ”. THINK SPICY along with being the “SPICE” in the bedroom is a winning combination for ensuring your own personal love slave…..

DRESS SPICY. Girl gone somewhere with those granny panties. Boy STOP with them sweat pants and wife beater.  Have you ever wanted to have sex with the bum on the street or the raggedy woman at wal-mart? (patiently waiting on the idiot-nympho that says yes) OF COURSE NOT! Better yet have you ever  went to a play that didn’t use costumes? You have to dress the part.  Fellas, find some nice boxers or dare I say it…boxer briefs combined with a few push ups and she’ll be drooling. Ladies, we have it so easy! Men could care less what you have on as long as there is a vagina beneath it so let’s keep it simple and spicy by finding some lingerie that shows off your partners favorite ASSet. Women if you prefer the au natural approach, surprise him with your highest pair of pumps, a promising smile, and a freshly waxed vagina for his viewing pleasure.

PLAN SPICY ACTIVITIES.  Listen if you didn’t get the memo, the whole watch tv and when its time to lay down you just automatically start your routine is played out! MIX IT UP! Plan a full blown make-out session BEFORE dinner (gasp).  You’re going to have to leave your comfort zone! Make a mental note and a special effort to surprise the hell outta your partner. If you’re feeling EXTREMELY spicy, accompany your lover to a local cabaret and receive an erotic couple’s lap dance, or better yet get all hot and bothered just by simply watching the exotic escapades. Or if you prefer, meet your lover at one of the local watering holes for a sexy game of “stranger”. When its time to go home and lay down for the night tell your partner how you want it( AGGRESSION IS HUGE TURN ON), or spend the evening browsing through the Kama Sutra for fun ideas. Take a trip to an adult novelty store and pick up a few items to try later. It’ll be fun and it will definitely get your minds right for a spicy evening.

EAT SPICY FOOD.   Not literally. Did you know that there are certain foods that cause your sex drive to go into overdrive?!  According to Organic Authority if you add any of the following to your menu you should experience a surge in your libido:  watermelon, avocado, chocolate, pumpkin seeds, celery, chilies, figs, and raw garlic. Now I’ll let you come up with the perfect recipes to include these items but keep in mind meals should be light. Heavy meals can cause you to feel sluggish and your sexcapades to be lazy and half hearted.

SPICY ATMOSPHERE.   In a sexy episode and you are rolling around on the living room floor and suddenly you hear a squeak! If you are planning a sexy evening let’s make a note to make sure your environment is CLEAN. No kids toys, work folders, laundry etc. lying around. Make the environment screams SEX or  I WANT YOU TO EFF ME!  There should be no doubt in your partners mind when they walk in what is going to happen there. This should include dim lighting, soft music (You can’t go wrong with Robin Thicke “Sex Therapy” album) and maybe a glass of wine.

These tips should help you to increase the spicy-ness of your bedroom activities. If you are unsure of trying any of these things just ask your partner. If you can’t communicate with your partner about your sex life then you shouldn’t be screwing them. ::shrugs:: ….until next time. Peace.

BAD BIBB PICK OF THE WEEK: KANDI BURRUSS

Posted by Drea's Rundown on April 11, 2012
Posted in: SOCIETY. Tagged: , , , . Leave a Comment

Photo Credits by EurWeb.com

Kandi Burruss is definitely my favorite Atlanta Housewife and a bona fide depiction of what a BIBB ( Beautiful Intelligent Boss Businesswoman) epitomizes in my book. Known for keeping it funky and authentic, this Atlanta native is far from being a typical “housewife”, and is all about her paper – knowing just how to DIVERSIFY her bonds in order to get it. Take notes ladies, this is a dope representation of what you can accomplish on your own merits…..

Kandi is a self-made businesswoman. This woman is paid a million  and one different ways to Sunday and has amassed her reported 35 million net fortune all by her lonesome. Men, eat your heart out. It’s rumored she currently has a boo thang… but if not you dudes need to send in resumes like ASAP!  This is a woman who likes making money just as much as she likes talking about sex. What more could you ask for? Starting with her days in the multi-platinum selling group Xscape, its safe to say Kandi ‘s been getting money for a while now. Not stopping there, after the disbanding of Xscape, Kandi kept it moving and began to focus on songwriting and production where she made BEAU COUP BUCKS on songwriter royalties for writing classics such as No Scrubs for TLC, Bills, Bills, Bill and Bug a Boo for Destiny’s Child not to mention many other artists. Not to mention my gal has been noted of late for writing songs across  different genres; working with Country heavy hitters such as Jo Dee Messina. Can you say Cha Ching $$$$?!! Do you know how much money is in the song writing business and especially when you’re versatile and can write music for multiple audiences??

Fast forward to present day and you’ll see this lady STILL  jigging to 50 Cent’s  hustler’s anthem, “I Get Money”. Nowadays this lady is everywhere from Bravo’s RHOA  and Kandi Factory, on-air for Kandi Koated Nights, Boutique Owner, and now she’s promoting her recently launched sex toy line Bedroom Kandi. This woman is seriously business savvy and has the foresight to invest in something that she ‘s actually interested in. Sex! Which is a genius idea due to the fact that the sex toy industry is currently on the rise and a 15 Billion dollar industry no less! Who knew the sex toy industry’s profits would sky-rocket during a recession? Obviously my girl Kandi! Werq! Like a true Taurus woman, Kandi is grounded  with her sights set on success and  steadily building her empire.  Kandi Burruss is definitely a BAWSE and a go-getter when it comes to making it happen…..

Real women…..#Salute.